Ogden Nash Quotes

"Life is sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating."

"Daybreak is one of the greatest disadvantages of living under the solar system: It means having to get up almost the very minute you go to bed, And bathe and shave and scrub industriously at your molar system And catch a train and go to the office an"

"You can take it as understood that your luck changes only if it's good"

"Poets aren't very useful Because they aren't consumeful or produceful"

"Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave, when they think their children are na•ve."

"They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of bread-lines. And they philanthropically cure them all by getting up a costume charity ball."

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold"

"If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work."

"Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?"

"Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind."

"The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control."

"I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it."

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."

"Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs."

"The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk."

"A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of."

"I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons."

"Too clever is dumb."

"Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying then without money?"

"The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat."