Erma Bombeck Quotes
93 Erma Bombeck quotes:
"I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
Bed Quotes
"All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
Courage Quotes
"As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her."
Category:
Belief Quotes
"A child develops individuality long before he develops taste. I have seen my kid straggle into the kitchen in the morning with outfits that need only one accessory -- an empty bottle of gin."
Category:
Children Quotes
"Never order food in excess of your body weight."
Category:
Food Quotes
American Journalist Quotes
"The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had a waiter in Canada who said, "Could I get you your check?" and we answered, "How about the menu first?"
Category:
Age And Aging Quotes
"Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving."
Category:
Funny Quotes
American Journalist Quotes
"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
Medical Quotes
"Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
Moms Quotes
"Dreams have but one owner at a time. That is why dreamers are lonely."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
Child-raising Quotes
"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."
Category:
Success Quotes
American Journalist Quotes
"A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday."
Category:
Birthday Quotes
American Journalist Quotes
"I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair."
Category:
American Journalist Quotes
"The bad times I can handle. It's the good times that drive me crazy. When is the other shoe going to drop?"
Category:
Bad Quotes
Successories, the leaders of inspiration and motivation, has unlocked iQuote: The Inspirational Quote Database, a curated collection of the most inspirational quotes. Raise your iQ and become a Quoteologist today!