Tim Allen Quotes
9 Tim Allen quotes:
"While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously."
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"Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive."
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"no class at Wilson has more than 22 students at this time."
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"We have a great team here. And we've received tremendous support from parents. We're really trying to bring this whole thing together to have a successful transition."
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"Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything."
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"Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words "large" or "size" with "rear end." Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me."
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"My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance"
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"Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded."
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"My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance."
American Comedian Quotes
Car Quotes
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