James Thurber Quotes

"You can fool too many of the people too much of the time."

"Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else?"

"Man is flying too fast for a world that is round. Soon he will catch up with himself in a great rear end collision."

"The appreciative smile, the chuckle, the soundless mirth, so important to the success of comedy, cannot be understood unless one sits among the audience and feels the warmth created by the quality of laughter that the audience takes home with it."

"A word to the wise is not sufficient if it doesn't make sense."

"Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?"

"Early to rise and early to bed makes a man healthy, wealthy, and dead."

"Progress was all right. Only it went on too long."

"We all have faults, and mine is being wicked."

"He who hesitates is sometimes saved."

"The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel."

"The sanity of the average banquet speaker lasts about two and a half months; at the end of that time he begins to mutter to himself, and calls out in his sleep."

"Last night I dreamed of a small consolation enjoyed only by the blind: Nobody knows the trouble I've not seen!"

"Laughter need not be cut out of anything, since it improves everything."

"Nowadays men lead lives of noisy desperation."

"One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough."

"Don't get it right, just get it written."

"It is better to have loafed and lost, than never to have loafed at all."

"The dog has got more fun out of Man than Man has got out of the dog, for the clearly demonstrable reason that Man is the more laughable of the two animals."

"Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead."